I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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