she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
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