69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize