real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
