Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
