no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize