Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
