Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
