I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
