I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
