after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I came so hard my ears popped.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
