He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
