So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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