Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(905): View more from Toronto

you alive?

(1-905): View more from Toronto

ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin

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(616): View more from Michigan

I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.

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(214): View more from Texas

A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.

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(858): View more from California

while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go

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(845): View more from New York

I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.

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(770): View more from Georgia

Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...

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(207): View more from Maine

Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone

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(425): View more from Washington

No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.

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