This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
