There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize