fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Someone shit on the floor
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Randomize
