Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
