Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
