I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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