First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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