Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
