I think I died a long time ago.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
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Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
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in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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