yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
