Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
