Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
