Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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