Dual....:-)
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
