i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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