She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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