she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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