I don't usually arrange sex via text message
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
