He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
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Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.