Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
