I skipped work to stalk him.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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