oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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