I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
