You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Randomize
