You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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