Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"

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  (305): he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question" http://tfl.nu/300d
  Replies (11) Good night (791) Bad night (3792)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"

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  (774): all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you" http://tfl.nu/p8m9
  Replies (19) Good night (2161) Bad night (5833)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job

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  (301): Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job http://tfl.nu/jdmg
  Replies (21) Good night (3614) Bad night (2176)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.

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  (716): He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready. http://tfl.nu/z83a
  Replies (9) Good night (4919) Bad night (800)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.

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  (970): I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat. http://tfl.nu/yfuv
  Replies (13) Good night (2236) Bad night (1238)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.

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  (601): I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents. http://tfl.nu/vupc
  Replies (17) Good night (2717) Bad night (978)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.

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  (858): Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning. http://tfl.nu/33hl
  Replies (4) Good night (1767) Bad night (650)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick

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  (774): Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick http://tfl.nu/t99o
  Replies (6) Good night (2296) Bad night (785)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....

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  (727): pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club.... http://tfl.nu/k1jz
  Replies (2) Good night (1895) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.

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  (770): I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time. http://tfl.nu/k05m
  Replies (5) Good night (1760) Bad night (621)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?

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  (405): Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night? http://tfl.nu/sl90
  Replies (14) Good night (799) Bad night (1432)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.

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  (610): One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings... (610): And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually. http://tfl.nu/lwux
  Replies (3) Good night (1432) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?

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  (254): when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger? http://tfl.nu/g708
  Replies (13) Good night (1167) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed

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  (530): My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed http://tfl.nu/lqy8
  Replies (5) Good night (908) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.

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  (720): I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left. http://tfl.nu/nrse
  Replies (9) Good night (451) Bad night (602)

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