Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Randomize
