mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize