I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
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I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
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Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
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