Small penises have feelings too.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
