my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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