Can Purell be used as lube?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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