i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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