If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
