am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
