I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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