I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
