But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
