i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
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She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
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I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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